Clearing out the fodder.

Sunday, the day of rest. Or the day of cleaning house, grocery shopping and prepping for the week ahead – as it has come to be in my house. Part of me enjoys the process of getting ready; cleaning, organizing, feeling prepared. The other part of me begs to rest and let someone else do the chores. I know somewhere in there is a happy medium. Balance in all things.

I have so many goals; health goals, writing goals, workout goals, life goals, etc. I continuously question if it’s too much. Then I ask myself “Am I enjoying each of these things?” and “Do I remember why I set out on this particular journey in the beginning? Is that still serving me?”

As important as it is for me to remember why I do these things, it is also important to ask if I am doing them with ease, or if there is a better way, a way that feels less cumbersome or burdensome. Is there a way for me to continue pursuing all of my goals that feels natural, organic, even fun?

Writing can seem arduous. What starts as a passion becomes a task with boundaries and rules and requirements. When I remove that, when I allow for free form, I am able to re-connect with my heart, which is apparently where I store all of my words. When I create space to clear out the fodder, everything opens up again; there’s a new sense of life and grace in the movement.

I can say the same for each of my goals. When things start to feel rigid or forced, I take a step back and give it room to breathe; take a day off that vegetarian menu, do a completely new workout or none at all, write a bunch of words on the page that make no sense, yell and scream into the void until I feel heard and can let it go. Maybe that is what rest looks like for me.

And so here I sit… with the bathroom cleaned, dishes washed, floors vacuumed and meals half prepped, thinking about all I’m setting out to do this week. How can I do it with more ease? Can I flip it on its head and see things from a totally fresh perspective? Can the Dodgers pull off this win, down three in the top of the 8^th? (Maybe I should turn the TV off during my writing sessions.)

All of the questions give birth to more questions and I have to real myself back in, remembering that I’m trying to create space here. At some point I allow everything to be just what it is, so that I can breathe and let it go. I’ll start a new day tomorrow, cleared of all this jargon and mess, with a rested spirit and goals to conquer.

 

 

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